The Can

Protect ya neck.

I somehow stumbled upon free tickets to Wu tang.  Literally just Wu Tang, the rest of the clan couldn’t make it.  I actually know nothing about this clan as I’m sure you can tell, but I am pretty stoked to spend some time with Mr. Tang this evening.  I now have evenings free so I have gotten a little bit more crazy lately… for example:

1.  I have gone to bed after midnight twice this week.

2.  I am gonna see the black guy from the Wu Tang in concert.

3.  I’ve been playing trivial pursuit online. 

4.  I bought a snuggie.

5.  I scammed the Blockbuster system and got two free movies.

One of those movies starred Will Ferrell.

I loved this movie.  Usually I can’t take Will Ferrell because he annoys me, but he kept his shirt on the whole time and barely opened his mouth.  This movie was like watching water drip.  My favorite role of his by far.  It even beat “Stranger than Fiction.” 

Speaking of fiction,  I went to a coffee shop today that had a typewriter inside for anyone to write on.  So bizarre but kind of neat.  I typed three letters on it p  q  r.  Then I stopped because I felt like I was on stage.  Anyway, I recommend everyone rent “Everything Must Go”.  Rent two movies and use the promo code SPRINGMOVIES.  There you go, your movies are on me.  Kind of. 

I’ll be sure to let everyone know how the concert goes.  Peace.

This is my house and I have to defend it.

I have already watched all three Home Alone’s. I don’t waste time on the fourth.  It went straight to DVD.  I know most of you don’t even waste your time on the third, but I am emotionally tied to it and I love John Hughes. 

Home Alone Phrase of the day: Silver Tuna.  Def: Meaning better than all the rest; the prize. 

Example:

 Oh how I love thee Home Alone’s.  Such a good moral message in each one.  In honor of Black Friday I had to watch:

This movie gets me pumped and ready to pepper spray when Black Friday comes around.  

I had originally written a whole Christmas blog about how everyone is forced to worship around the holidays whether they want to or not, but then I had to delete it because I had to go to work.  I didn’t know I had to work that day, I was taken off guard. I didn’t really have the energy to re-write it because it was kind of a one time thing full of emotions and sincerity.  So now you get this.  The movies I have seen so far and a list of my favorite Christmas albums.  

Not in any order.

1.  Christmas to Remember- Amy Grant

2.  Hanson- Snowed In

3. Barenaked for the Holidays- Barenaked Ladies

4.  Wintersong- Sarah McClachlan

5.  Songs for Christmas- Sufjan Stevens

6.  The O.C. Mix Three- The O.C. Soundtrack

7.  Christmas Collection- The Carpenters

8.  Merry Muffin- Various Artists

9.  The Hotel Cafe Presents- Various Artists

10.  If Bon Iver had a Chrismtas Album I’m sure I would be obsessed.

Most Hated Christmas Song:  Santa Baby.

I find it hard to relate to.  However, I am open to different versions that I don’t know about and maybe might like.  So if you know one, hit me up.  

Well time for a figgy pudding!

It’s beginning to look a lot like my favorite holiday.

Last weekend I had the best visit of my life from one of my besties/brother’s lover, and when I say lover take it with a grain of salt.

Anywho, the three musketeers went wine tasting all over the place.

The above picture was us in Vegas awhile back.  We didn’t take any wine tasting pictures because we aren’t camera people. We are still looking for a fourth musketeer with a camera or an iphone.  That’s the only way we will let them in.

Yeah it was so fun to be back with good friends.  Something I have been craving for awhile now.  

My job is getting grosser by the minute.  Somedays I love it and other days I want to light a match and burn that motha down!  Is that normal?  Is it possible to have a job that you love completely.  I have no idea, but I think so.  I know I was created to do ministry and I am completely ignoring my calling but that will all change soon.  

Christmas is here. Timing is here. Bring a good friend.  Christmas is Here. (Sung to the tune of carol of the Bells)

I’m weird.  As Christmas approaches I am craving a holiday party like no other.  I might even throw my own.  THERE IS NOTHING I LOVE MORE THAN A GOOD CHRISTMAS PARTY WERE YOU GET DRESSED UP!  Seriously.  I also love gift exchanges especially when it is spelled X-mas gift X-change.  I find it to be original and neat.

Phrase of the Day:  ”Burning the candle at both ends.” I used to think it meant being really sick and going to the bathroom out of both ends but it actually means working hard and playing hard too.  You run out of wax.  I learned this when a lady in my journaling group said it to me when I told her I was sick.  

Well, time for white rice and homemade sushi compliments of the whoofers.

BOOtique.

So, I got a new bike that I ordered online.  

Do you see it?  It’s the one with the orange rims.  It’s faster than dirt.  It’s also Halloween colored which is neat for this month only.  

Speaking of Halloween…I have been brainstorming costume ideas.  I know it seems like I am really into Halloween, but I’m actually indifferent.  I just like to be culturally sound.  Anyway, I think I am gonna be slutty Clifford for Halloween.

                                                  

If you have any ideas on how slutify this let me know.  

Over the past couple of days I have been watching one thriller per day.  I went and saw the new movie “Dream House”.  It was pretty good.  Definitely what you would classify as a good wholesome thriller.  Last night I watched my favorite thriller of all time

                                                    

Perhaps you have heard of it.  1985.  Made for cable.  I recited the whole synopsis at open mic night last night and I don’t have the energy to do it again.  Just know that you will be on the edge of your seat/couch even though the blood looks like cake.  Thank you Matthew Miller for having this movie on beta.  

Tonight I will be watching “Misery” unless I can find my favorite lifetime channel thriller of all time starring the dad from Home Alone (John Hurt).  I highly doubt I will be able to get my grubby little hands on it.  I will let you know though.

Boo.  Happy Halloween.

Michael W. Smith said it best “A friend’s a friend forever…”

There’s nothing like childhood friends.  They know apart of you that everyone else missed.  Though, they might not know the current person that you are, they get updated over the holidays.  It’s really the best of both worlds.

Speaking of holidays… has anyone ever seen this movie?

It’s a made for TV movie that came out in 1997 and it’s based on the Disneyland/World attraction. Anyway, my friends and I would watch this every Halloween at their house because they had it taped on VHS.  My friend HP reminded me of this just today.  I remember one year we were getting ready to watch it, but we couldn’t find the tape and everyone was so annoyed.  And we were like 28 when this happened.  No matter how old we get, we still act like children when we come together.  We still have sleepovers with all six of us!  

This is us a few years ago at Alex and Ashley’s Dad’s wedding.  I love these guys.  

New friends are pretty cool too.  My roommates are so awesome.  They just got married and they had one of the most intimate ceremonies I have ever heard of.  

This was in Portland. Very simple wedding with just a few witnesses.  How awesome is that dudes?

I love it.  

Nothing beats a gloomy wedding.  Unless you’re Alanis Morisette who hates rain on her wedding day.  

What do you call a hot dog with no bun?

This week has been a real train wreck.  The plumbing backed up at the restaurant, meaning we had to shut down for a bit.  Meaning I had to hand out gift cards to people who were halfway through their dining experience and apologize to them and  explain that they were never gonna get the food they ordered.  Try to explain that in seven words or less with a smile on your face.

Meanwhile, there was better luck at the Portland RL.  

This is Becca Paxton with her cool 8th Birthday hat and popcorn shrimp!  Yummy.

In other news, I can’t get my jaw to stop clenching.  I feel like the Wolverine.  

It’s so annoying that I took three muscle relaxers just so I could sleep and then I was a grump the next day for almost the entire day.  I started yelling at people and treating them like crap.  I’m not proud of this, but it’s true.  I felt like I was sleep walking.  

I also lost my wallet.  Yes, the wallet that I have had since seventh grade.  I actually remained pretty calm about it.  I simply cancelled all my cards and now I am waiting patiently for my new ones to come in the mail.  I am pretty sure my wallet fell into the river while I was riding my bike over a bridge.  I felt like George in “It’s a Wonderful Life.”

 

The only difference is that he jumped in and I did not.  Oh well.

All in all it was a great week though because I learned a lot about myself.  

Movie Review:

50/50.  That’s my rating.  It was half good and half bad.  Joseph Gordon Levitt is awesome and Seth Rogen literally needs to be shot in the head.  Plus, his teeth are absolutely disgusting.  See it at your own risk.  

New season of Dexter premiered this week.

Hella excited.  Though the fact that he is having marital problems with his sister really puts a damper…

I hate marital problems.  Which is why I avoid marriage at all costs…and because no one will marry me and I have no idea why.  There are a million reasons why I should be married right now:

1.  My body has never looked better.

2.  I finally make enough money to pay for all my red bull.

3.  I saw a stray cat the other day and didn’t throw a rock at it. This means I am growing as a person.  

Okay, I guess that’s only three reasons.  If I were to be totally honest I would tell you that I have been thinking about it because all my old boyfriends are either married now and have one child or are engaged to be married.  Which means I could be married right now with two children and one step child.  I feel neither hot nor cold about it.  Plus, step kids are trashy.  

Halloween is right around the corner.  What are you gonna be?  I haven’t decided yet.  I’m leaning towards Clifford but any ideas would be helpful.  

I am also a sucker for Xtreme sports movies.

To name a few.

Because of my obsession I rented the movie “Skatleand”.  Have you heard of it?  It won an award or two at Sundance.  

Yeah, it’s seriously awful.  It looks good, but it’s not.  It’s awful.  Guess what’s even better?  The main dude (who looks like an old co-worker of mine David Larson) was supposed to play Edward in the Twilight saga.  As a matter of fact, he was Hardwicke’s first pick but Bella liked Robert better and she had final say.  Isn’t that nutty nuts!  I think so.  

I guess the movie could have been worse.  If you want to see a really awful movie rent this one:

It says it’s magical on the cover, but trust me it’s not.  It’s magic that you don’t kill yourself half way through it.  I think there is one line in the entire movie, I kid you not.  It’s gotta be the smallest script ever written.